Escaping Escapism; Are You Guilty?

When we hear the word “escapism,” many of us immediately think about substances that alter our state of being to allow some relief from our stress response. Escapism is common in almost every person’s life at some point during the day, and it isn’t only achievable with substances. Escapism is practiced by distracting ourselves from emotions we aren’t ready to process, numbing ourselves from unwanted emotions, or avoiding situations altogether that may lead to emotions we’d rather not experience.

We may achieve our escape by staying late at work even though our relationships could use a little more time and attention. We may clean the house compulsively instead of tackling that graduate paper that’s due in 2 days. We might sleep an extra 2–6 hours to avoid thinking about that job we can’t stand or skip that workout we don’t feel motivated to complete. Most of us engage in escaping stress at some point by streaming shows online, hanging out with friends too long, or some other socially acceptable way of numbing and avoiding responsibilities. Even if we’re not doing it all the time, it only takes one time of escaping a responsibility to throw us off balance.

So, how do we escape escapism? Follow these five tips to formulate your success.

Step 1:

Don’t wait until you reach a state of burnout to give yourself rest and relaxation. When we overwork ourselves, we will eventually run out of energy. When that happens, it takes much longer to regain the energy needed to complete tasks or provide quality connections in relationships. Make sure you avoid the practice of “all work and no play” when you’re attempting to succeed in a chosen career, rekindle or maintain good relationship health, or balance your daily tasks. Recharge your batteries as needed to prevent burnout and the need to escape. Adequate rest, in turn, will increase your productivity overall.

Step 2:

Keep track of the things you tend to put off for later. If those things are always in the same area of your life, then make a mental note of which things or people end up neglected. Next, be intentional about prioritizing productive time in those areas. If you’re up to your eyeballs in debt and working long hours, that may mean that your relationships will lack the attention they need. You can make the most of 15–30 minutes by being fully present and engaged during the time you do have with those who matter to you. A quick text to let someone know you love them or are thinking of them is better than putting off that interaction for months and hoping they will understand because they may not. If work or studies always get put off in favor of your relationships, create clear and healthy boundaries to shift your priorities, communicate those changes, and then form goals to help you stay on track in your work or studies.

Step 3:

Don’t wait for red flags and crises to pay attention to the areas of your life that are important. Oftentimes, we neglect some priorities until it’s crunch time or until someone threatens to leave us. This means that now ALL of your attention needs to be placed in that area for some time while you rebuild what’s broken. This amount of pressure creates the need to escape the terrible situation by avoiding it altogether because it feels too overwhelming to address. By noticing small shifts of energy, subtle disappointments, and the early warning signs that indicate trouble in your future, you’ll be able to adjust your behaviors before the bottom drops out. This will save you time and energy in the future and make your life much more functional and manageable.

Step 4:

Allow your emotions to surface before they’re boiling over. One of the primary reasons we engage in escapism is because we have avoided our emotions for so long that we no longer know where they originally even came from or how to step back in time to solve the issue and feel relief. As soon as you start to feel stress or anxiety, check in with yourself to see where those emotions are stemming from. If you wait until the pot is boiling over, it’s a much messier mess to clean up! Talk through your emotions in the mirror or with a trusted friend to see if you can figure out what’s leading to these subtle warning emotions before they become extreme symptoms of distress. This type of emotional maintenance will keep you from having to numb your emotions or escape them altogether.

Step 5:

Don’t let procrastination be a word you or anyone else can ever use to describe you! Allowing yourself to make a habit of procrastination will set you up to need an escape from the responsibilities that need your attention. If you notice that responsibilities are becoming overwhelming, allot 15 minutes a day to each project until you’re making gradual progress towards completion. Working towards your goals steadily is far better than avoiding them altogether. Almost all of us can allow at least 15 minutes for something we deem “important” in our lives. Even just 15 minutes a day will add up to almost 2 hours of progress each week. Read that book, write that paper, fold that laundry, do that meditation, and wash those dishes a little at a time until you’re back on track with your goals. Usually 15 minutes will turn into 30 minutes or an hour of progress, and you’ll feel much better than if you had vegged out in front of the TV.

BONUS TIP:

Learn to multitask! Most often, we want to read a book or watch a TV show for entertainment. Entertainment is important because we want to keep our minds stimulated with new information, but we could always watch that TV show while we’re tackling a mundane chore. We could listen to an audio book while showering or driving to our next destination. Make use of the mental space that’s available while you’re handling a physical task so your mind isn’t starved for entertainment after you get home from work. This can also help to give your mind something to think about aside from the things it would normally stress over. Yes, some forms of entertainment are okay as long as they’re handled responsibly!